Tuesday, November 11, 2008

2 years

Dear P,

We have been married for two years today. At risk of sounding cliche I have to tell you that it's been the most wonderful two years of my life. People always say that they "know" when they find their soul mate. You and I both agree that we did not just "know". Both of us were happy in our lives and didn't know what we were missing with out eachother. You have filled a part of my soul that I didn't know I was missing before I met you. You have brought into my life, things that I never would have considered...and now love so very much. Friday night high school football, Oasis Concerts, the mountains...I have so many great memories that would never exist had we not started dating, fell in love and got married.

I think to myself how many things had to take place for us to even meet. You had to make the decision to stay at Ohio State and not go to Toledo to go the Pharmacy Program your sophomore year. I had to decide to go to grad school and get placed in Stradley for my assistantship. Aimee had to be on my staff when she SHOULD have gone on to another building by then. You still had to keep in touch with her and be willing to come help her staff the office til she could hire freshmen. I had to just happen to be in the office the day you were giving her a hard time and you, quiet, shy, reserved, introverted you...had to ask Aimee for my information so that after you quit working there, you could stay in touch. That's a lot of "chance" that could have never happened. I think our choices in the past brought us together for our future. Once we started dating and you got deployed to England, you could have gone out with the guys...and you didn't. You were so committed to me that they started calling me "wifey". Perhaps your Guard Buddies knew then, what we hadn't realized yet.

When you came back and I was working for OU, you had a choice to come to Athens, or stay in Columbus for grad school. It was just chance that you got offered an assistantship in Athens. It was around then that I really started to "know." You kept showing me how very much you wanted to be in my life...whether it was hanging out on my couch waiting for me to come home from late meetings. Or "rescuing" the dog when my residents set off the fire alarms at 3 a.m.

I am so sorry that I doubted your commitment to me and our life together and had that meltdown the night before you proposed. I just wanted so very much to KNOW that we were going to be together. I'm not a patient person and I appreciate how you held me and kept saying 'just trust me, everything will be okay'. That's such an important role that you play in my life. I'm a doubter, a worrier...and you remind me that I just have to trust Him, trust Fate, trust You...everything will be okay.

Throughout my sister's anxiety and depression when she was so unhappy in high school, when I was so worried for her...you said she'd be okay. She is. Through my job searching, my miserable year at THAT one college, through my own anxiety attacks. You are the only one that can hold me and tell me to breathe with you because everything WILL be okay. You have NO idea how very much I appreciate that steadiness and that compassion. I know how lucky I am as a woman, to be loved by a man that can connect with me when I'm scared and vulnerable. Through my dad's heart surgery and my mom's meltdowns..when I had to be strong for them, you were there. I know that you always will be. That's one area of my life where I do know that everything will always be okay. With you.

As mad as you can make me. As mad as I can make you (sorry). I love you with every ounce of my soul, with every cell of my being and with my whole heart.

I am so proud of you and the work that you do as athletic coordinator for osu-n/cotc. The kids you work with need you and you give them such great experiences. You are an amazingly talented man and my heart swells up with pride when I sit in the stands and watch you run around cheering them on and making sure that their games run smoothly. I know they're a pain, but you do SUCH a good job. You will be great. Your "84 year old man" in the back of your head will be very very happy when he looks back at his life.

I can't wait to see what this year brings for us. What you and I will do and experience together. I know that no matter what happens we will be better than 'okay.' It's been 2 years, I look forward to 2 million more.

All of my love, always.

yours.

4 comments:

Heather said...

aww happy anniversary!!! :) i'm glad you are so happy. hopefully you have many more years of happiness. :)

and b said i should have told the guy that i was married to an officer. but there wasn't any way to bring it up and i thought he wouldn't believe me... :(

Jen said...

Sweet words..Happy anniversary. Wishing you both many many many more years of happiness.

Donn24g said...

awwww happpy anniversary!! What a great post! It warms my heart:)

You really need to post some more pics of you guys (and your wedding-- now 2 yrs ago!) Just dont have enough!

Lump said...

such a beautiful post. thanks so much for sharing! hope you and your hubby have a WONDERFUL ANNIVERSARY!!!

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